| Here's a compilation of some emails, picked more or less randomly from my mail folders. Maybe it's interesting to read them, and it should explain why I've first encoded my email address into hex-format (6E 6F 63 61 73 68 40 77 6F 72 6B 2E 64 65), and then (as that didn't help much) completely gave up the nocash@work.de address, and got myself a new non-public address which isn't listed in the readme, help text, webpage, or elsewhere. | That mails quickly became a annoying major problem, I have tried to read that junk for years, probably lost half of my brain and hundreds of important mails among that garbage, and silently cursed those idiots. On the other hand, most of them probably didn't knew how much I did suffer under their 'harmless' questions, and most are probably just children whom asked for help. |
| Well, I am completly tortured, but not really angry. To avoid that somebody else reads the messages below and sends spam or angry mails to that guys I've overwritten all names and email addresses, but beside for that I didn't change the message content, it's not censored, and contains 100% authentic bullshit, read on own risk! |
Subject: work
Date: Sun, 21 Feb 1999 09:24:13 EST
From: Xxxxxxxxxx@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
mine says when i click on blue i downloaded it thAT IT CAN NOT BE FOUND
|
Maybe it'd help if you'd threw blue inTO THE TOILET...?
Subject: Help
Date: Thu, 18 Mar 1999 17:13:03 +1100
From: "<Type your name here>" <xxx@netlink.com.au>
To: nocash@work.de
YOU SUCK, TRYING TO SCAM A SUPER NES CONTROLLER you dont need it to make
a fu<king emulator and you dont need cash or comics or coffe or a pocket
gameboy e-mail me how you need them and i will not call you a piece of
shit
|
Dear Mister 'Type your name here', I am very pleased to meet you, too.
Subject: NOEMS
Date: Mon, 22 Feb 1999 17:57:55 EST
From: XxxxxxXXX@aol.com
To: Nocash@work.de
Dear Sir;
I have just downloaded the Game Boy emulator, and I need some help with it.
The "readme" said that I need to remove "NOEMS," but I do not know how. So,
could you tell me how? I would appreciate a response to this E-mail, ASAP.
Thank you very much.
Xxxxxxxxx X. Xxxxxxxx.
|
Okay, first of all, are you sure that you have downloaded NOEMS already?
Subject: bogus website
Date: Sun, 7 Feb 1999 11:18:04 EST
From: XXXXXXXX@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
I have tryed just about every website for the no$cashgmb but I cant find it
and your website said you had it and you did'nt you should take off the icon
if you don't have it
|
Maybe my friend has it, but he won't give it to you.
Subject: emulator problems
Date: Tue, 23 Feb 1999 16:37:54 EST
From: Xxxxxxxxx@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
Hi I have emulator problems with my gameboy. I can not get pokemon red or
blue version to work for it. I hope that you can send me another emulator
gameboy and pokemon red and blue version so that it will work. Thanks for
listening. Bye
|
Alright, I'll make a new emulator for you and mail it as soon as possible.
Subject: help me
Date: Mon, 22 Feb 1999 19:39:07 -0500
From: xxxxxxx xxxxx >xxxxxx@bellsouth.net>
To: nocash@work.de
yes i got the game and the emulator and it tells me (mmsystem281 could
not be played. check the file name or install a driver that supports
this type of file) help me please!!!!!
|
Ah yes, did you try unzipping it with MS Paint rather than Media Player?
Subject:
Date: Tue, 23 Feb 1999 18:29:09 PST
From: "Xxxxx Xxxxxxxxx" <xxxxxxxxx@hotmail.com>
To: nocash@work.de
hey can you please help me I got the pokemon blue game
and when I click on the gmb icon it says:
Increct system version
Run windows systen setup program again
What should I do?
|
Maybe run windows setup again?
Subject: Emulator trouble
Date: Tue, 23 Feb 1999 21:51:17 EST
From: Xxxxxxxxxx@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
Wut is PKUNZIP.exe ??????
|
Don't know, sounds like my latest PoKemon game.
Subject: Money
Date: Tue, 23 Feb 1999 22:07:36 -0600
From: "X Xxxx" <xxxxxx@earthlink.net>
To: <nocash@work.de>
LISTEN YOU FUCKER, KEEP YOU DAMN OPINIONS TO YOURSELF. HOW DARE
YOU CURSE AT THE LORD!!!!!
LOOK HERE BUDDY I GOT A COUPLE OF THINGS TO SAY TO YOU:
1. YOUR PROGRAM IS A PEICE OF SHIT, IT WONT RUN FOR NOBODY
2. YOU SAY YOUR SOME POOR ASS LOSER...HAHA FUCK YOU, LIAR
3. DONT YOU EVER CURSE ABOUT JESUS...
Now that thats off my chest...... I feel better
BUT I WILL NEVER FEEL GOOD TORWARDS YOU
|
I HAVE NOW REALIZED THAT THE LORD LOVES ME MORE THAN HIS IRON DICK
Subject: I NEED HELP
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 16:04:37 EDT
From: XxxxXxxxXX@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
Hi,
I just downloaded you Gameboy emulator and i'm having mad trouble
with it. I have no idea what to do. Can you help me. Please E-Mail me at
"XxxxXxxxXX@aol.com" thanx a lot
|
Thanks to your detailed description it should be no problem to fix it.
Subject: please send...
Date: Fri, 11 Jun 1999 11:58:04 EDT
From: XXXXXXXXX6@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
please send me yellow
|
Careful, careful, or I'll really give you yellow right into your face.
Subject: HELP
Date: Fri, 11 Jun 1999 14:29:17 -0700
From: Xxxxx Xxxxxxxxx <xxxxxxxxxxxx@earthlink.net>
To: nocash@work.de
Can you give me instructions on how to install emm386, ems, please!
|
No, you won't understand it, go away.
Subject: Hello
Date: Sun, 4 Oct 1998 21:40:41 -0400
From: "Xxxxxxx Xxx" <xxxxxxxx@yahoo.com>
To: <nocash@work.de>
Hello, I'm Xxxxxxx (Xxxxxx) and I want you to send me E-Mails when you get
new stuff. Thank You!
|
Sure thing, I'll let you know then I get hot stuff.
Subject: Damaged Key
Date: Mon, 20 Dec 1999 17:16:05 +0800
From: XxxxxXxxxXX <xxxxx@doctor.net.au>
To: nocash@work.de
I gave you $10 aus dollars in exchange for the No$Gmb Licence key
I got a reply in the email with the key i have used that key for a while
now then when i recently downloaded The newest version of No$gmb it says
the key is damaged but it still works on the old No$cash can you please
send me a working copy for the V2.3a
Thanx and your emulater is the best
|
Needless to say that I never heard of these guys, nor that they did register.
Subject: Try it
Date: Sat, 19 Feb 2000 20:09:39 -0500
From: "Xxx" <xxxx@snoopymail.com>
To: xxxxxxx@xxxxxxxx.xxxxx.xxx.xx
Dear Friend:
This is an invitation for my personal friends to become lenders in
the Liberty International Foundation.
The minimum to participate is $1000 US which generates $10,000 after
six months paid to you by cashier's check.
[...]
|
Dear friend, would you please go and bother the Lord?
Subject: hgb
Date: Thu, 17 Feb 2000 14:32:51 -0500
From: Xxxx <xxxxxxx@sinfo.net>
To: nocash@work.de
I have a question.....
The hgb emulator is your???
why it dont have a guide??? i need to know how can i play with two game
boys (cable link) with the hgb emulator...
!!Please i need to know!! email me if you know.... and thanks
|
No sorry, mine is hzt, which is yours?
Subject: you are a idiot Date: Mon, 12 Jun 2000 22:23:51 -0400 From: xxxxx@directo.cl tu eres realmente un maldito idiota y tu emulador apesta hijo de puta. eri un culiao eri un aweonao gigante you are a real idiot and your emulator sucks you are a fucking boy and stupid son of a bich you are the most stupid gay in the funcking world you mather is a bich and all your family SUCKS. senkay kinshan haya ERI UN HIJO DE PUTA CULIAO CHUPAME LA QUE CUELGA MARACO |
Que madito la apesta eri un culiao?
Subject:
Date: Tue, 1 Feb 2000 09:44:58 +0800
From: "Xxx Xxxx Xxx" <xxxxx@tm.net.my>
To: <nocash@work.de>
how do i download no$gmb?
|
You can't.
Subject: Upcode???
Date: Wed, 15 Sep 1999 19:20:10 -0500
From: "Xxxxxx Xxxxxxx" <Xxxxxxx@kconline.com>
To: <nocash@work.de>
When I run the program it says I dont have an "upcode". The game is
Pokemon and if you dont know it where can I find it? Reply to
xxxxxxxxxx@yahoo.com .
thanks.
|
Does it also say that you don't have a delight overflow?
Subject: Can't get out of dos
Date: Wed, 14 Jul 1999 03:09:25 EDT
From: XXXXXXXXXX@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
Could you please help me. I was playing pokemon pinball in dos mode and i
tried to quit out of it. Now every time that i start up my computer pokemon
pinball also starts. could you please help me on how to work it in windows
and get back to windows. I would also like to know how the gameshark works.
Thanks a lot!
|
Great idea! Hey, I could also make it translate to arabic, what do you think?
Subject: Registrition Key
Date: Thu, 1 Jun 2000 17:36:44 EDT
From: XxxXxxXxxx@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
I have this registration, witch I paid for, for No$GMB 2.1 and I recently
downloaded NO$GMB 2.2a and I cut and pasted the registration.key to that
folder but it says illegal or damaged registration key and I did get it from
sending money (first I tried a while ago to download an illegal one but it
did not' work so I sent money to you) So can you repair or send me the
updated one for free via e-mail. Thanks
Xxxx
P.s. I enclosed the dameged/or NO$GMB 2.1 registration key.
|
Okay, I will send one for free, or maybe I can directly upload it into a newsgroup?
Subject: It's about pokemon
Date: Tue, 23 Feb 1999 19:23:19 EST
From: XXXXxxxxx@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
Sorry to bother you but it still won't work it says not enough memory and i
don't know what you mean when you tell in readme to check something please
help me thank you
|
I just meant what I said.
Subject: damaged register key
Date: Sat, 11 Mar 2000 13:13:22 -0800
From: "Xxxxxx" <xxxxxxx@wa.freei.net>
To: <nocash@work.de>
i got this from you a while ago and my freind was messing with when i was
helping my mother with something and it said that the key was damaged or
illegally owned i also think it maybe because i dowloaded the 2.4 verson
and i started to have problems with it at about then so. i would aprtiate
it if you could please it and return it.
|
It isn't damaged, it's just that blooksuckers like you may not use version 2.4, nor any other no$gmb versions.
Subject: Damage key
Date: Wed, 29 Mar 2000 16:25:09 -0800
From: "Xxxxxx Xxxxxxxxx" <xxxxxxx@gateway.net>
To: <nocash@work.de>
The key that I have is damage, see if you can help me out because it won't
work for my emulator.
|
You've stolen the key, and the message says "illegal or damaged", is that so difficult to understand?
Subject: it doesn't work
Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 21:20:02 EDT
From: Xxxxxxxxx@aol.com
To: nocash@work.de
My emulater doesn't work. I've tried everything and nothing happens. What's
wrong?
|
Yes.
Subject: Postage
Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 16:22:27 -0000
From: "Xxx" <xxxxxx@email.msn.com>
To: <nocash@work.de>
Would a post from the USA get to you if using US stamps
Or would i need stamps from Germany ?
Thanks Xxx xxxxxx@email.msn.com
|
I think you must first fly to germany, and then put it into german mail ;-)
Subject: Damaged Registration Key
Date: Mon, 06 Dec 1999 08:55:26 GMT
From: "Xx xx" <xxxxxxxx_xxx@hotmail.com>
To: nocash@work.de
Martin Korth,
I registered your product at the start of the year. Just today a went to
your site and downloaded the newest version. But when I go into your program
it says that it is an illegal or damaged registration key. I have attached
my key as it says in the readme file (readme.txt). I have NOT obtained this
key illegally. I hope you can fix my problem.
>From Xxxx
mailto: xxxxxxxx_xxx@hotmail.com
|
Yes, yes, of course you haven't stolen it illegally.
Subject: Japanese
Date: Mon, 2 Aug 1999 21:38:51 -0500
From: "Xxxx Xxxxx" <xxxxxxx@execpc.com>
To: <nocash@work.de>
The pokemon game is in Japanese.
IM NOT JAPANESE. why.
Write back xxxxxxx@execpc.com
|
<Sigh>
Subject: I am the Devil
Date: Tue, 19 Oct 1999 22:45:27 +1000
From: <xxxxxxx@telstra.easymail.com.au>
To: [Undisclosed Recipients]
I am the Devil! (and you are Death)
How is the people I decided to send an email to. I have nothing
interesting to say, but what I like to do is write email's to the people
I know so that I get an email back making me look important in-front of
my friends! Everyone write to me!
Xxxxxxx Xxxxxxx
-The Devil
|
Good luck!
Subject: your gay little pokemon emulator doesnt work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Date: Wed, 03 Nov 1999 21:06:53 CST
From: "Xxxxx Xxxxx" <xxxxxxxxxx@hotmail.com>
To: nocash@work.de
Im never downloading anything of yours until you fix my emulator
|
Fine, that'll be a big relief.
| Whew, you got through it, read all messages, and your brain has survived the procedure? Congrats! Now that's been just the usual amount that arrived within two days. If you still say that it's funny, and/or became boring - then imagine how it feels when you get 10,000 of these mails... | However, now please don't think that all no$gmb users are annoying idiots and lamers - I'd suspect that the majority are idiots and/or lamers - but nevertheless I've also got a couple of very helpful detailed bug reports, and some very (very) friendly, intelligent, and highly motivating comments. |
PS: In case that some people didn't understand what I've been talking about: The above are questions that I do not, did not, will not, and would not reply to - even if you'd have my new email address, please go and bother somebody else.